So, I know that I said I was ready for the girls to go back to school. I was. I was ready for us to settle back into a routine, for the chaos to settle.
But then, they brought home all of that stinkin’ paper work, and I had a whole ‘nother think about the situation. What’s that all about? I get SO tired of signing my name over and over and over. And sometimes ON THE SAME FORM! HELLO! Don’t you see my John Henry at the bottom?
And another thing! What about those conduct or discipline policies. Each classroom or teacher has a different one? And they want my signature on each one. Do these people not talk to each other? Do they not teach in the SAME BUILDING - WITH THE SAME PRINCIPAL? Wouldn’t one policy work?
And how about those signature lines they hide on the back side of papers? I really love those. I missed one of those on a piece of “rainbow paper” and Rea nearly hyperventilated because she was going to “get in trouble”. I don’t appreciate teachers putting that burden on her for my mistake.
I particularly LOVE signing homework papers – especially those with “A’s” or “100’s”. Exactly why am I doing that? Can anyone out there tell me? I truly want to know, it’s one of the unsolved mysteries of the world. Is it a torture device? Are teachers documenting court cases against lax parents like me? Will they someday depose me?
Teacher: Yes, Nelson’s Mama, on ten occasions you failed to initial math papers that had 100’s on them, exactly what was the problem!
Nelson’s Mama: I was volunteering at the homeless shelter, helping out at church, then, um, then, I was in a coma! Besides they were 100’s…
Teacher: That’s absolutely NO EXCUSE!!
I just know, provided that I ever get my ducks in a row, get over my problem with New Guy, and, you know, get to Heaven. That St. Peter will meet me at the Pearly Gates and say “Sorry, you can’t come in, you didn’t sign all of the school papers right”.